Monday, December 29, 2008


I miss my daughter! My heart is angry, in anguish, and sad, but most of all broken.

I haven't seen Madilynn since Christmas. I know that to some of you that doesn't seem long, but 4 days without your infant baby seems like an eternity (to me at least), Even when I do see her it feels like it is inconsistent, like a day here and a day there...Especially when her Dad sees her daily with the exception of my Saturday and Sunday. If I was to calculate it I am pretty sure that it would show that Dan has her 85% of the time! I feel like most of the time, I am without her. Yesterday I was cleaning her room desperately wishing that she was there in my arms!

Dan denied me seeing her yesterday, so I called the police, they issued me an escort to retrieve her. I am so fed up with him keeping her all to himself!! Two Police Women came exactly an hour and five minutes after I called. They told me that according to the state of Minnesota she should be in my care, and I had every right to have her. They proceeded to Dans home, as I waited in my car (I was so thankful to not have to confront the situation)... I heard them arguing, Dan saying some not-so-kind words to them [Proverbs 18 1Unfriendly people care only about themselves; they lash out at common sense... 7The mouths of fools are their ruin; they trap themselves with their lips.]. He refused to give them Madi as well, he said that she is 'his' daughter and he had every right to keep her, from what I overheard he was not kind to them at all! We had no papers, the court has yet to give us the ruling. The police officers will be writing a report and they said that it won't be helpful to him when we go to court.

I was crushed, I soo looked forward to holding her in my arms last night! I am so eager to hold her tonight, I am going to cuddle her all night long, if Dan follows through with giving her back to me that is.

I will be calling my lawyer today; hopefully he will have some much needed advice for me. After the occurrences this Friday and Sunday, I need to know my rights and what I can do to take care of my child's best interest! I am eager to hear the ruling from the Temporary Court Hearing...

Until then I am going to try and give it to God.
Matt 11: 28
Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

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